The Ring

How to Keep a Bachelor Party from Going out of Control

How to Keep a Bachelor Party from Going out of Control

Bachelor parties are important guy rituals, where men can blow off some steam before the big day and for the groom to reassure his pals that he will still be "one of the boys," even though he will be making a commitment to his wife.

Bachelor parties are not what they used to be. Instead of strippers and stogies, a lot of men opt for other styles of party. It may be a good idea to take an outdoorsy weekend trip, white-water rafting or fly-fishing. Staying closer to home also offers opportunities like unconventional activities that are fun and extraordinary, like paintballing or touring a brewery.

When organizing a bachelor party, have a thought for the bride-to-be. She has feelings, but your job is to make the bachelor happy before he ties the knot. Setting a limit that can be adhered to by both parties in the marriage makes the whole process feel less like each partner being constrained and more about setting boundaries within the relationship.

Bachelor parties started out as gentlemen's parties where men got together for a civilized evening of drawing-room banter accompanied by drinking, probably smoking, and toasting the bride's health. Things changed and the majority of today's bachelor parties have thrown off the civilized bit in favor of raunchy nights on the town. The sort of people who attend has pretty much stayed the same.

The best man organizes the shindig and gathers together the male friends and relatives of the groom. One way of ensuring a party has little likelihood of getting out of control is to make sure that there aren’t a ridiculous number of friends invited and that everyone has a history of getting along.

The best man’s responsibility is for the groom, and it’s the groom’s party. Avoiding any mishaps involves the use of the best man’s head. He needs to make sure nobody drives home drunk. If possible, hire a limo or car service for the evening or have a designated tee-total driver, or ensure everyone takes a cab home.

If you want to be sneaky, then do so within reason. It’s all part of the fun getting together with other groomsmen to come up with some ingenious plan that will surprise the groom and engender raucous laughter among the audience.

The groom deserves attention. Some would love to humiliate the groom, teasing him at the bachelor party by getting him drunk, taking incriminating photos, or shaving off all his chest hair. Getting involved in antics like this is entirely up to the participants, but as Best Man, you need to be aware that when the groom says "Stop," it does mean stop.

To take any financial rankle out of the event, costs should be split equally between all those in attendance at the party – except, of course, the groom. Be creative and don't forget to carry a loaded camera.